I'm Done with It
by silver tears85
Summary: Katniss Everdeen is done with being the person everyone uses, the one who has to provide for everyone. She'll be the Mockingjay alright, but for her own gain, and on her own terms.


Hi, silvie here. I just love saying that. This story comes right after Catching Fire, more of the book than the movie. Hope you enjoy.

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Katniss's heart was filled with dread, fear but, most powerful of them all, hatred. She despised it-no, them- all.

Betrayal wasn't a concept Katniss was used to. In the Games, she hadn't had any allies, only Rue and she was dead. But betrayal was just another emotion, another side of pain and she knew pain very well. She knew it too well.

Haymitch had betrayed her and, she had to admit, it hurt. He was the one Katniss had thought that would always be there or at least understand her. Her pain and suffering, she'd thought, had been understood by him more than anyone.

Her former mentor told her beforehand that if Peeta volunteered there was nothing he could do. That was before she'd found out that his goal all along was to keep her alive, so she could be his Mockingjay.

When the 'girl on fire' had asked him to let her die, she did it because Peeta deserved it, and it was obvious that Haymitch's goal the last Games had been to keep her alive, but also for another reason.

Katniss wanted to die. She wanted it all to end. Mockingjay, you say? Not. She wasn't brave or strong, just a victim of circumstance. She'd made the call to support her family because that was the position life stuck her with. It was selfish, but she wished she could have it easy. Katniss wished everything didn't rest on her shoulders.

Peeta was her friend, her crutch. He was there when no one else was. Yes, Haymitch understood her pain, the dark side of it, which was really the only side there was. But Peeta comforted her.

Peeta was her everything and she lo-

No, she didn't. She didn't love Peeta. Katniss was sick of the lies. She didn't love him, she just used him. She took everyone else's pain on herself and he took hers. She hurt him badly and he just took it because he loved her that much. He'd even offered to watch over Gale, when he knew she loved Gale and not him, though at this point, Katniss wasn't sure she truly loved anyone.

She wasn't justifying what she'd done, but at this point everything else was so bad, whatever she did couldn't possibly be any worse.

Maybe Peeta understood that Katniss needed someone to use. Or maybe he was just that great. Either way he was captured.

The Mockingjay wasn't giving up. If anything, she was just taking flight. She wasn't the same, hadn't been since the first Games. She was more ruthless, more selfish. She had been since becoming a victor. The Nightlock stunt was actually intended to be a slap in the face to the capital. At the time, her thoughts were:_ If I'm gonna die, let the capital remember me and despise me. Let me die with the satisfaction that I outsmarted all of them_.Now, she was just admitting it.

And the fact that she didn't feel guilty about it now made her all the more dangerous.

Saving Peeta was a possibility, a small one, it might not happen. Since Katniss was being honest now, she had to ask herself, would she really care if he died? She'd been through so much hurt in her life, caring about anything other than Prim and maybe Gale was hard. She even questioned if she cared about them.

All that for later.

Right now, she had to focus on the Capital. Saving her family and District 12 and stopping the Hunger Games is all good and all, but those just came apart of her true goal: To watch the Capital and everyone in it burn.

And one way or another, President Snow would suffer.

Not because of Peeta or this or that, but because a lot of her own suffering, most of why she had to grow up so early, was because of the capital and its rules.

Call it wrong, call it right, it doesn't matter. War is war.

The people didn't need a goodie- goodie to lead anyway. They needed a killer who would tell them what they needed to hear. They needed someone whose words could make all the deaths seem worth it.

Katniss Everdeen was now ready to fit that role.

She was done with being the girl who was everyone's crunch.

Katniss was going to do what she wanted to do. Lives meant nothing to her as long as her goal was complete. She would see the capital on it's knees one way or another, anything else that happened was collateral damage.

She was fine with being a broken shell, if the Capital was broken right along with her.

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Done with it. (This story I mean). It just hit me. I was listening to Yellow Flicker Beat (The title is a reference to it) and watching Catching Fire.I would love to see Mockingjay, except I haven't read the book yet. *pout*.

Anyway, hope you enjoyed it. This is a darker take on Katniss. You could say she's succumbing to her pain and becoming numb with hatred being the only emotion she can feel at this point and she's is anxious to see her enemies fall and suffer and ultimately burn... And on that happy note, please Review. Tell me how much you love it, what I can improve in and how, or just a random thought this made you think of.


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